Deep Reflection Series 3.02 – The Secret Romance of Being
What if the deepest intimacy is not with another, but with the quiet presence of your own being?
🖌️ There is a kind of love that asks for nothing.
It does not crave attention or demand clarity. It lingers quietly, unfolding not in words, but in presence.
This love is not directed outward. It is not relational in the conventional sense. It is a romance that begins when the self, no longer distracted by approval or ambition, begins to notice its own existence, not as a function but as a mystery.
After the first quiet encounter with the invisible self, something begins to shift.
It is not a transformation. There is no breakthrough and no new version of you to celebrate.
Instead, there is a tenderness. A softness toward being.
You wake, and your breath is not just a sign of life. It is an arrival.
A Love Not Measured
Modern life gives us love in metrics.
Follows, comments, feedback.
Love becomes visible when it is validated, and romanticised when it is shared.
But there is a secret love that does not seek confirmation.
It lives in the moments between demands.
It emerges in silence, in the still air of a room before thought has returned.
This romance does not say, I must become.
It says, I already am.
And that is enough.
The writer might describe it as a kind of tenderness that can only be written around, never directly.
The child might recognise it without explanation, knowing instinctively that being held and being seen are often the same thing.
The wanderer, unburdened by destination, might discover it in the hush of places that offer no answers, only space.
Beneath all of these perspectives lies a simple truth.
The self is not only known when it is useful.
It is loved when it is witnessed.
Being as Intimacy
This love is not loud. It is not ecstatic.
It is the kind of intimacy that deepens not with time, but with willingness.
The willingness to sit with yourself, not for the sake of growth, but for no reason at all.
You drink your tea slower.
You stop rushing the walk.
You read the same sentence twice, not because you are distracted, but because it moved you.
In these subtle shifts, something happens.
You begin to feel with your life, not just think about it.
You no longer observe from above. You enter the texture of existence.
This is the romance.
Not a relationship with someone.
A relationship with being itself.
An affection for the simple truth of presence.
Can you love your own presence without turning it into a project?
If something within these words calls to you, you might find resonance in the beginning of this journey —
Deep Reflection Series 3.01 – A Quiet Encounter with the Self
There is a kind of seeing that begins not with sight, but with attention.
➤ A Gentle Invitation
As we reflect on the secret romance of being, consider this:
Is it possible that the self does not need improvement, only attention? True intimacy does not begin with strategy. It begins with presence, with the quiet joy of being with yourself, not for what you could become, but for what you already are.
This exploration continues in our next reflection.
—#WritingCulture— by Ellis Zeitmann @ThinkZeit
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